How many times have you wondered if “this” is the “final”?
Making the decision to get married or living with a partner requires its reflection.
The problem comes when you decide once and never again, come back to ask.
Or when you pretend that this is so.
The other day talking with a friend, I had concerns about whether “man” with whom he had a relationship, was the right person. He was considering leaving or not, to live with him, but his mind was filled with doubts.
Is this the “definitive” be?
Do I want to spend with him, “the rest of my life”?
Am I making the right decision?
Women have timeless mental discussions on many issues, but this can have our heads, giving a lot of laps.
What if I’m wrong?
It is clear that before making a decision, you need to make yourself some important questions, but then have to decide, because you can not, stay in the eternal question.
What often happens is that, until we live, we can not know.
How to know if coexistence is good with someone you’ve never lived?
You do not know.
You’ll have to take time, experience and then decide again.
I imagine you’re now asking …
But how, with what it cost me to take the first decision, now I have to decide again?
You are right.
But this time, the decision will be easier.
For your questions, and are not based on simple theories.
You’ve had an experience and have more knowledge of the facts, as they say.
Experience is your greatest treasure
Not the same thinking about how we solve a problem, to have that, to experience how it was.
Not the same imagine how the work of the house, make a list and distribute your count.
Not the same image that each party will assume, you have to negotiate, what happens when it is not.
No color.
So sometimes it is better to risk a month to be thinking about something three months.
Art thou of those who wonder, from time to time, how is the relationship of those who choose once and no longer ask more?
From my point of view, married or living together, deciding once and then he will “renew” the decision, as it somehow.
If you feel respected and cared probably not have much need to ask “how” are in the relationship, because in general, you will feel at ease.
But coexistence will bring many frictions and reflection can do, which improves communication between you.
Some questions that you could do:
- Is there something we can improve?
- How is communication between us?
- Are we able to resolve our differences?
- Are we missing something or we have too?
- What can I do differently?
- Is there another way to view this situation?
- Is there something that bothers me?
If your relationship does not just feel good, you may have to make, in addition to the above, these others:
- What is missing in this relationship to be successful?
- Is it something we both can and want to work on?
- Am I willing to continue investing in this relationship?
- Worth it”? (If you let me suffer)
- What can we do to feel better?
- Etc.
There are many questions, but again, the question is not put to think, but to think, speak with the couple and make decisions to implement.
Come on, TAKE ACTION.
What has more value, once you choose your partner or that choice every day?
What is more valuable, they choose you once or every day you choose?
What do you prefer?
When you choose each day:
- I am confirming your commitment to wanting to be with that person
- I’m telling you and saying that you want to stay with him
- You are valuing each moment spent in that relationship
Because…
At any time, you could choose to leave or you could choose to leave.
So I ask again, and you, what do you prefer?
I have it clear
I know it’s not easy to leave a relationship, but I also know from experience how painful it is to stay beside whom you do not agree, does not see you or respect you.
Quoting Jorge Bucay says “I do not want to be next, who do not want to be with me.”
I prefer to be alone.
Therefore, it is important for me to cultivate the relationship, take care and watering, as we do with plants.
Or add fuel (or passion) to fire, that will not fade.
And so every day, continue to choose what I want in my life.
And if one day, which I have, is no longer what I want or need … I have to make decisions, though I know it will be painful.
But the decision to get married or living with a partner is something that for me, we have to go “reviewing” occasionally.
Just to check that everything goes well.
My proposal
- Take a few days to reflect: make a list of pros and cons.
- Make a decision.
- Take some time to experiment.
- Think again.
- Back to choose from.
Do you stay with what you have or you have to start to look the other way?
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