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Miriam Esquivel

Online psychologist

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What price are you willing to pay to get what you want?

In order to get what you want, wanting it isn’t enough.

You have to pay a price.

And this price can relate to many aspects of yourself and your life.

In this post I’d like to help you understand that just wanting something isn’t enough to make it come true.

First, you desire what you want →then you want it→then you visualize it → and finally you START ACTING accordingly.

It’s in this “acting”, where things get a price.

I also include some suggestions in this article to make it easier for you to pay the price

Contents

  • 1 The economic price
    • 1.1 Suggestions
  • 2 The price of time
    • 2.1 Suggestions
  • 3 The emotional price
    • 3.1 Suggestions:
  • 4 The “physical” or “corporal” price
  • 5 Mental price
    • 5.1 Suggestions:
  • 6 Relational price
    • 6.1 Suggestions:
  • 7 3 Foolproof Steps to learn to Say No and Earn People's respect

The economic price

It’s true that, currently, you have to invest relatively less money to do some things than 10 years ago.

But that doesn’t mean that you don’t have to spend any money.

I haven’t calculated how much I’ve invested in training as a psychologist, but with all the training I have, I can assure you that, it’s a lot.

And every new challenge involves a new money investment.

In my case, the challenge of creating my website, managing it, solving technical problems, etc. has been and is still an expense. But I could also see it as an investment, it depends on how you look at it.

If you want something, you have to have a financial budget for it.

What economic price are you willing to pay to get what you want?

Suggestions

  1. Calculate: do you know exactly how much money you need? If you don’t know it, estimate it. Look for information and do your calculations. Try to get a monthly budget for the money you’ll have to invest in.
  2. Divide: If what you want requires a big investment and you don’t have it, you can always divide your goal, and make small achievable investments.

The important thing is for the “I have no money,” excuse to not stop you from achieving your dream.

The price of time

It’s said that it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert in something.

precios de las cosas que quiero

It takes at least 5 years.

Of course you don’t need to invest all that time before achieving anything, but when we set a goal, we must plan on investing some time..

The day only has 24 hours, you know that.

So, if you want to improve on something, you’ll need to spend more time doing that thing, which will take time away from other things.

Right now I’m dedicating an average of 3-4 hours a day on my project, though I don’t always achieve it.

Also:

  • I have decreased my social life
  • I don’t watch TV (only movies from time to time)
  • I listen to podcasts when I’m in the car or I if go out for a walk
  • I read books when I’m on the subway or train

So I find time when I can, so I can invest in my project.

If you are considering changing some aspect in your life, you’ll need to review your daily activities, to evaluate the hours you can devote to your goal.

Suggestions

  1. Prioritize: evaluate the things you spend your time on from 0 to 10, zero meaning it’s unimportant and 10 that it’s very important.
  2. Get organized: consider how you’ll organize your day, in hours. Based on the above assessment, take hours from the less important or dispensable things, and use them in your new project.

What price are you willing to pay in time to start your path towards what you want?

The emotional price

Emotions are a part of you. When you ask yourself what you want to achieve, the lifestyle you want to have, the things you’d like to do, etc. the response is always accompanied by a thrill.

precio emocional

On the one hand, there’s the illusion, the willingness, the desire, the motivation…

On the other hand, there’s the laziness, the frustration, the disappointment, the fear…

During your project, your emotions will change.

Based on my experience I can tell you that I started a project excitedly and let’s say “innocently”, in the sense that I had no idea what doing an online project implied.

After many hours of work, and with, I could now say “normal” results, there are days when I’ve felt frustrated and I’ve wanted to give up. Luckily this feeling disappeared soon and I began fighting again.

When you start a project, what you expect and what you get, might not be the same.

It’s then that you start doubting everything.

Because there’s a part of you, that mental tyrant that comes up without being called, that usually gives you a very negative picture of the situation.

He makes you feel sad, disappointed, unmotivated …

On the other side, there’s the “warrior” who wants you to fight for your dream.

She gives you positivity, energy, strength…

When all goes well, the warrior holds the power, but sometimes the mental tyrant takes over and tries to stay on the throne.

It’s then that you’ll need to learn to manage your emotions, if you don’t want them to take control of the situation.

Suggestions:

  1. Accept any emotion that arises: feel free to feel any emotion you may have. We have already discussed the importance of not denying what you feel in other posts. Accepting it gives you the ability to manage it.
  2. Learn to manage your emotions: you need to understand that your different parts talk to each other (for example, the rational one and the emotional one), to work towards a common goal. And don’t lose your inner drive, the energy you need for your project.

Are you willing to pay the emotional price to get what you want?

The “physical” or “corporal” price

I’m not sure how to call it, but you will understand it better if I explain it under my own example.

My web project means that I spent many hours on the computer.

cansancio mental

At a corporal level, it makes my body stiff, my eyes burn, gives me a backache …

And I’m “just” sitting.

It looks like I’m not doing anything.

But there are days when I don’t know why, my body is completely exhausted.

Imagine if my dream was to create my dance company or to be the champion of a particular sport.

What I mean is that you have to keep in mind that achieving your dream will take a toll on your body, and you need to take care of it to keep it healthy and strong.

Suggestions

  1. Exercise: to keep my body from rusting, I try to do yoga, go for a walk and sometimes run.
  2. Take breaks: when you spend a considerable amount of time doing a task, you need to do something else to break the monotony and boost your energy. Try to stretch for 5 minutes, dance, go for a walk or take a nap. Try to listen to what your body needs and give it to it.

Mental price

For me, being entrepreneurial requires a range of skills and knowledge that I lack.

Now I have to deal with several things:

  • Being trained in what I don’t know
  • Solving simple technical problems
  • Writing articles
  • Creating content for social networks
  • Learning how to use new programs
  • Making changes to my website
  • Making videos
  • Etc., etc.

I also have to keep up to date with different psychotherapy related areas.

All these things require great mental concentration, because I’ve never done anything like that before, which means I have to learn by myself.

If you want to start something new, you may first need to train you and learn some new skills and competences.

Suggestions:

  1. Prioritize: you need to know what you have to do first, second and last. Sometimes it’s hard to figure it out, but making a list can help.
  2. Plan: You can have an overall annual goal and then every month, something more specific. Smaller goals each week, and each day a list of tasks that will help you on the path.
  3. Relax your mind: practice meditation, take free days where you don’t think about your project, distract your mind with other things. This will help you maintain a good mental balance.

What mental price are you prepared to pay to get what you want?

Relational price

Just as you took hours from other activities to dedicate them to your project, you’ll also need to take them from your relationships: friends, family, partner …

relaciones importantes

You need to consider this because sometimes, you’re so involved in your project and have so many things to do, that you don’t realize you also need to take care of your relationships.

Especially the closest ones.

They need you and you need them.

Remember that we are social beings.

Suggestions:

  1. Find time for your relationships: for your partner, your friends, your family, your children … include them in the time you set aside for the important people in your life.
  2. Negotiate: your closest ones may become resentful because you’re not spending as much time with them as they’d like. So try to find a balance, and agree on something.
  3. Schedule timetables: it’s so easy not to stop … that sometimes you even have to force yourself to do it. I can tell you from experience, hehe.
  4. Take care of yourself and of the ones you love: above all remember that to be able to take care of others, you need to be well yourself.

 

After explaining some of the prices you’ll have to pay, I again ask you:

What price are you willing to pay to get what you want?

If you want, you can write your answer in the comment section.

 

3 Foolproof Steps to learn 
to Say No and Earn People's respect

Responsible: Miriam Esquivel Blanco, being the Purpose: sending my publications, promotions of products and / or services and exclusive resources. Legitimation is thanks to your consent. Recipients: your data is hosted on the servers of my email marketing platform Active Campaign,. See Active Campaign's  privacy policy. You can exercise your Rights of Access, Rectification, Limitation or Delete your data in info@miriamesquivel.com. For more information, see our privacy policy.

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Filed Under: Coaching | Tagged With: psychotherapy, self-help

Miriam Esquivel

Me llamo Miriam Esquivel y me encanta mi trabajo: ayudar a las personas a conectar consigo mismas y a crearse la vida que quieren.

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3 Foolproof Steps to learn to Say No and Earn People's respect

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Responsible: Miriam Esquivel Blanco, being the Purpose: sending my publications, promotions of products and / or services and exclusive resources. Legitimation is thanks to your consent. Recipients: your data is hosted on the servers of my email marketing platform MailChimp, located in E.E.U.U. and protected by the EU-US Privacy Shield. See Mailchimp's privacy policy. You can exercise your Rights of Access, Rectification, Limitation or Delete your data in info@miriamesquivel.com. For more information, see our privacy policy.

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​3 Foolproof Steps to learn 
to Say No and Earn People's respect

Responsible: Miriam Esquivel Blanco, being the Purpose: sending my publications, promotions of products and / or services and exclusive resources. Legitimation is thanks to your consent. Recipients: your data is hosted on the servers of my email marketing platform Active Campaign. See active campaign privacy policy. You can exercise your rights of access, Rectification, Limitation or Delete your data in info@mypsicologa.com. For more information, see our privacy policy.

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