How many times have you asked yourself: he loves me, he loves me not?
And, even though the evidence stands out, you continue to deceive yourself, because accepting unrequited love or heartbreak is a painful process.
Because sadness is a misunderstood feeling, those who really love us (friends, family, etc.), so as not to see us suffer, will try to cheer us up, even with half lies.
But I’m NOT going to deceive you. Basically, because I’ve deceived myself many times and, in the end, it wasn’t worth it.
The sooner you learn to accept unrequited love or heartbreak, the sooner you’ll be able to stop hurting yourself.
I’ll start by assuming that you want a relationship, and that both need time to decide whether you like the other, are fulfilled by them, if you love them, etc., after a while, you need to know that:
– If you call him or text him and it takes him 3 or 4 days to answer
– If you propose doing something on the weekend but he’s always too busy
– If he doesn’t ask or isn’t interested in what you want or are interested in (your needs)
– If when you propose to make things “a bit more serious” and he says “he doesn’t want to commit”
– If when you do meet, you always end up in bed
Because a person who loves and appreciates you,
– is interested in you
– calls you
– asks you what you want to do
– cares about your needs
– answers when you ask questions (by text, phone, in person)
– And, usually, likes to see you and spend time with you
And of course, this needs to happen both ways.
So, even if you want to believe the lie, don’t be fooled.
Even if your friends tell you…
“He hasn’t called you in a week, but that means he likes you.”.
Noooooooo, if he hasn’t called you in a week… this man, isn’t as interested as you’d like him to be.
And that’s fine!
Once this is clear, you’ll be able to make decisions.
He won’t be your boyfriend, but he could be your “friend with benefits”. Although I’ll talk about this in another post, because this type of friendship tends to be dangerous for women, if they don’t manage it well.
Or, he can be someone you see once in a while, to do something you both enjoy.
Or, you may decide to walk away, and look the other way.
If right now you’re not in a situation like this, but have a friend who is, I know it’ll be hard to tell your friend, who’s super in love, that “the boy she likes, doesn’t love her back”, but,
Will it hurt her more now or later, when she’s gotten her hopes up more?
So, I encourage you: whether it’s happening to you or a friend, to accept this amazing and simple truth about unrequited love or heartbreak:
– If he doesn’t give you what you need, he doesn’t love you
– If he doesn’t take care of you, he doesn’t love you
– If he doesn’t care about you and your things, he doesn’t love you
– If he doesn’t have time to be with you, he doesn’t love you
And what’s more: this kind of men,
DON’T DESERVE YOU!
And you, you don’t deserve to be with someone who doesn’t care about you.
Why would you be with someone who doesn’t care, when there’s someone in the world who does?
Are you going to settle for less?
I hope not!
Hopefully these words will help you make decisions and stop deceiving yourself about heartbreak or unrequited love.
If you liked this post or know someone who could use it, I’ll thank you to share it and help me reach more people.