Are you living like a dead person in life that you live your life without noticing it?
How many times have you asked yourself the question of what to do with your life?
When I was 18, I wanted to be the director of a department in a company, so I studied business administration and management.
I was lucky to start working in a multinational while studying, and so I could see and experience firsthand the business scene.
But to my surprise, after a few months of working there, I began to feel empty.
But how could that be?
If that was what I wanted!
I was in a large company, I was studying business … I was clear about my way, how could I doubt?
When doubts assail you
I can tell you now that doubting is the most normal thing in the world.
And indeed, the doubts tell you that “something“ is not working well.
My doubts about my work and my studies made me rethink what to do with my life.
Of course at that time I had no idea.
If right now you’re doubting what you want in your life, I congratulate you.
Because doubting is the first step to take control and responsibility of your life.
The feeling of doubting can be a bit uncomfortable, because your head cannot stop thinking.
You spend the whole day analyzing the infinite possibilities that could happen.
And finally, you end up exhausted without having done anything to change your situation.
But I would say, give yourself permission to doubt.
It’s okay to hesitate for a while, because you need to think.
Go from not knowing what to do with your life to be clear about it, it means accepting the doubt as part of the process.
So take it easy and be glad, because the moment you start doubting and/or rethinking things, you’ve stepped out of that uncomfortable feeling of not knowing what to do with your life.
The price of NOT decide
Doubting is necessary, but I will also say that your goal is to make a decision
Because if you decide not to make a decision, you going to become a living dead.
Living dead is a person who goes through life without:
- being present
It’s getting up in the morning, put on autopilot and do “whatever it’s what it has to be.”
And live the day as if you were a heartless robot, without passion or enthusiasm.
I hope you’re not one of them.
Don’t you know what to do with your life?
Well, then make it up.
- Play imagine.
- Play wrong.
- Play to try different things.
And after playing, I guarantee you’ll have a clearer picture of what you like and what you dislike.
Ask yourself questions
You can also make the typical questions to help you to get out of your doubts:
- How would you like your life to look like in 5 years?
- What would you do?
- With whom?
- Which job would you like to have?
- Where would you live?
If you win the lottery tomorrow and the money is no longer a problem for you, what would you do?
Answer these questions without judging, without limiting yourself and let your imagination run wild.
The idea is to get this “ideal” picture of your life.
See what’s in your life with another look.
It’s not needed right now to make a radical change in your life.
But you can choose.
You can be a living presence.
And if you don’t like what you see in your life, but right now you have no possibility to change it, you have to learn to look with different eyes.
Based on what is in your life NOW, what can you do to enjoy it more?
How can you spend more time on what makes you feel good?
What is preventing you from being happy with what you have now?
Do you really have to change things or is it the way you look at them and your attitude on what you have to change?
Overcome the fear of making mistakes
I know people who are so afraid of doing something wrong that, even they don’t like the situation in which they are, they rather stay in it, because they are unable to decide.
If that’s the case I’ll propose an exercise:
Over the next week, ask yourself this question every day :
What is the worst of the worst that could happen if I give that step?
And let your mind responds without restrictions.
You’ll discover which are your most primitive fears and what it is holding you back.
Sometimes the only way to know what you want to do with your life is doing it wrong.
How many times has happened to you than having a preconceived idea about something or someone, you had made a number of expectations about how it would be that job, that relationship, that friendship, etc. and then when you are in the job or with that person, you realize that the idea you had and what you are experiencing, it’s something completely different.
I think we all have lived something like this.
You have to try and experience because it’s important that you have “the experience” and don’t remain only with your idea.
If you don’t know what do you really want, try to take different paths and perhaps in one of them, you catch yourself enjoying it.
And if the enjoyment doesn’t come, based on your results, try to modify the way by adjusting the direction and gaining confidence in your steps.
Here again, I must remind you that this process takes time.
And I repeat here what I said before about the question:
Accept failure, error or mistake as part of the way.
Of course, there is a very important thing that Einstein told us:
“If you want t get different results, stop doing always the same things”
Seems obvious right?
But it’s something, we use to forget.
You don’t know what to do with your life so, you keep doing what you do every day or even you intensify the same you do, hoping to get a different result.
If you feel lost and that your life has no meaning, that may lead you to feel sad, disappointed and frustrated. And with that feeling running your day, lite will you able to do to change your course.
If tomorrow you come to think the same and feel the same, you will return to do the same… so hard, your results will vary.
I think you can very well understand this, but tell me:
What have you done or thought differently today than what you did or thought yesterday?
Take the first step, however small it is
When you imagine a change in your life, maybe you create a completely different image from what it is your life now.
That, on the one hand is fine, as long as it motivates you, but otherwise, if you see it far away, it can even come in to discourage you.
Because you don’t see the end of the road.
Even if you have a very different final goal, ask yourself TODAY tiny and bearable goals in a short period of time.
Because the important thing is not to get your goal, but to start walking and leaving the place where you are now which doesn’t like you.
Take one step and then another and then one more.
Practice and have fun practicing!
Keep your motivation
Even if you go step by step and with small goals, everything requires an investment of time, energy and sometimes also money.
So there will be times, days or situations in which you’ll lose your motivation.
You’ll wonder if it’s really worth taking away stones of the road, and I am here today to say YES.
Yes, IT’S worthwhile.
Even though you would never reach your goal, you cannot imagine the satisfaction that comes from walking on the path you’ve chosen for you.
The feeling of owning your life, your choices and your mistakes.
The learning that as a person generates to you.
Actually, for me, it’s worth it.
But of course, if one day I’m feeling low, because it also happens to me, I allow this feeling and then managing my emotions, I begin to imagine the kind of life I want to have, the type of person that I want to become… and thanks to life for all the achievements I have reached so far, and thus, my motivate comes back.
Keep your motivation in the process of what to do with your life, imagining it, trying to feel you are already there, and letting the feeling of that image flood your heart.
If this works for me, maybe it will also work on you.
Because if taking these little steps you find your passion, what you enjoy, then the reward will be twofold.
And remember that life is a game and we’re here to play and to experiment.
It’s better to be wrong than to be paralyzed.
And that the greatest risk is to go through life without living it, nor being present in it.
So, if you still don’t know what to do with your life, don’t be distress you, it’s ok.
Take a little step and test how you feel.
If you like, take another little step.
If you don’t like, change the direction.
And eventually, when you look back, you’ll realize the path you have done.
I hope my words help you to take away the pressure of having to know exactly what do you want to do with your life.
And you can give yourself permission to experience new things.
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